CNN Scandal

Ron Paul really has no chance of becoming President of the United States. But what should we do if he says something wild or crazy in a presidential debate? Ignore him.

What if he gets applause?

Wait it out. As soon as the clapping dies down, turn the focus to the other candidates. And then keep asking them questions. Ignore Ron Paul. Better yet, cut him off. Make it sound official, like, “Excuse me, Senator Paul, so sorry for interrupting your response, but we have a question for another candidate. We’ll get back to you in two minutes.”

And then let’s hope he forgets what he was talking about. Hopefully he won’t complain like he did when Fox News cut him out completely. Give him just enough to keep him happy.

What about after the debate? Ron Paul usually gets favorable responses from people watching these sort of debates.

Not this time. We won’t even mention his name. It’s all about McCain and Romney. Maybe we’ll say that third guy, Huckabee, had a good debate. We can even have regular people tell us who they think won the debate.

What if they say Ron Paul won the debate?

Good point. Let’s make it a small room of regular people. And edit the video. Cut out everything they say about Ron Paul. No sense in wasting time covering a guy with zero influence.

———-

The above is an imaginary discussion between Anderson Cooper and CNN executives. Yet I think it’s fairly accurate. They conducted a January 30th debate in the Reagan Museum, and all of the above actually came true. I’m not a big supporter of any candidate, Republican or Democrat, but it seemed tonight Ron Paul was getting unfair treatment.

The opposite happened for Democratic candidate John Edwards. Hilary and Obama were bickering at each other, and Edwards came out on top, saying something like, “I feel like the only grownup here.” Huge applause. After the debate, he got major coverage.

Similar situation: McCain and Romney were bickering about some nonsensical issue. After what felt like ten minutes, Ron Paul put their bickering into perspective. He received huge applause. After the debate, no coverage. Too bad. I expected more from Anderson Cooper and CNN in general. Well, at least they don’t misleadingly tout themselves as being “Fair and Balanced.” It still hurts, though.

Spider-Man 3 — gripes

Who created the Sandman? Some unknown scientists doing unknown experiments in some shady unknown location? Why did they vanish the next morning, never to return?

The scientists didn’t even bother checking their radioactive sandbox. Otherwise they would’ve seen the Sandman tumble right in.

I really like the scene in which the Sandman rises for the first time—very impressive! But also a missed opportunity. There could have been a more realistic atmosphere with the Sandman, being in the middle of a top secret science lab. Like when Doc Ock came alive, slaughtering those doctors who operated on him—great scene!

Also, why did Pete Parker have to be so unlikable throughout the entire movie? No character arc. He was self-centered before and after donning the black suit.

Speaking of the black suit creature . . . odd how it feels “plopped” into the movie. No real interaction with the main characters. Or any characters for that matter. It seems more like a stray, shy puppy that nobody cares to bother with. I was hoping for a little more acknowledgement. Like, hey, there’s a brand new creature in town, people, so watch out! Would’ve brought greater tension and drive to the story, don’t you think?

(Be sure to read my alternate opening sequence for this movie.  It used to be part of this post, but I decided to keep it separate.)

Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles

My substitute teacher is a freakin’ terminator! Of course, we didn’t know that. Not right away. He could’ve fooled anybody. Yet we did sense a definite wrongness about him. He was a big guy, his suit and tie a little too small for him . . . almost like a suit our regular teacher used to wear. We tried joking about it, but got no reaction.

So without a shred of emotion, he sat, mechanically, and began roll call. I saw him grab a letter opener—the kind that looks more like a thin dagger—and he brought it beneath the teacher’s desk. He sounded like he was scraping something. Chewing gum, I thought, imagining little black spots of gum stuck to the teacher’s chair. And he’s scraping them like mad.

The names droned on. Finally he got to the new kid in class. John Connor, I think. Scruffy kid, kept his head down the whole time.

“John Connor,” said our sub, literally scanning the room. He saw John’s hand go up.

Two things happened simultaneously. The classroom list of our names fell away. And then our sub—the terminator—rose to his full stature. In the same fluid motion—as if he had done it a thousand times before—he drew a weapon unlike any I had ever seen. A laser gun, perhaps, streaked in blood.

Only too late did I realize where the gun came from, where he’d been hiding it. Our sick n’ twisted sub had scraped through his own leg—jagged flesh gaping—revealing the gun strapped against a shaft of artificial bone. Metal hydraulics hissed as if maintaining balance.

No way, I thought. Not in any sense of the word was this guy human.

Shots fired. John Connor threw himself to the ground. More shots ripped through walls, shattering windows.

The terminator charged in deadly pursuit.

This has been a dramatic reenactment of a scene from the TV show Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles. I expected very little from it, having felt disappointed from Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines. There wasn’t much story left to tell, I thought. It’s going to be another lackluster rehash of the first two movies.

Not so! Although I’ve only seen two episodes, by far the TV show is way better than anything in Terminator 3. Here’s what we get:

1. Sarah Conner’s gloomy yet prophetically hopeful narration.
2. Resistance fighters and scientists who have traveled back in time to help the Connors.
3. Lots of terminators ambushing our heroes in different and exciting ways.
4. A good terminator that’s of a strange new make and model that none of the other terminators can identify.
5. Great mystery surrounding the origins of Skynet, the network of evil robotics.
6. And, most importantly, every character looks authentically cool and not the least bit annoying . . . so far.

Alone in the Dark

A team of Secret Special Soldiers go exploring an old abandoned goldmine. They are all wearing standard issue paintball uniforms, which come with black short-sleeved t-shirts, elbow pads, and teensy-tiny helmets. Yes, they are well prepared against bloodthirsty monsters from an alternate dimension.

The team comes to a dead-end, and one of them shouts, “Dead-end! Let’s investigate!”

If you like dead-ends, this movie is chock full of ‘em! Actor Christian Slater is in this, and he loves dead-ends! Whether it’s his relationships, his job, or even his quest to save the world. One thing never leads to another!

What to expect with Alone in the Dark:

1) An ancient puzzle of gold, the pieces of which are scattered throughout the globe . . . and nobody bothers putting it together—ever!

2) A golden box, lost at sea for thousands of years. What’s inside? No clue! A guy who pulls it up onto his boat keeps reminding us, “This thing is solid gold!” Two scenes later: “Even the handles are solid gold!” And then, after opening it, just about everyone on his ship dies a bloody death. From what? No clue!

3) A couple of suspenseful scenes with Christian Slater, alone with his girlfriend, hunted by something lurking in the dark. Creatures materialize out of thin air and become the special effects highlight of the movie.

4) A depressing finale. It’s like turning over pebbles in a dead-end cave only to have it collapse on your head, leaving you with one massive logic-defying headache. The end.

Rambo’s First Outing

Andy Warhol once likened this movie to Friday the 13th, just another slasher with people getting picked off by a killer one by one. Sorry Andy, I disagree. Rambo’s first outing is more different than most horror, suspense, and action movies put together. How? Nobody gets killed!

Throughout numerous explosions, shootings, stabbings and smack-downs, John J. Rambo refuses to kill. Alone after coming home from the Vietnam War—no friends, no family—he simply wants to be left alone. But a stubborn sheriff, obsessed with his own interpretations of the law, pushes Rambo a little too far.

All the while we are treated to important topics . . . about survival . . . about how the media (and the minds of people in general) can be manipulated with misleading info . . . about the treatment of men and women in uniform suffering from P.T.S.D. (post-traumatic stress disorder). . . .

We even get a Christmas tree and a couple of humorous moments thrown in just for the fun of it! Every scene is clear and easy-to-understand. The music is memorable (even the 1980’s power ballad during the ending credits; like it or not, it’s unforgettable!). Rambo’s first outing, also known as First Blood, may have happened a long time ago—from another era in the U.S. history of action movies—but its thrills and ideas are definitely still relevant in today’s world.